


fog and glow

by thelesterhowells



Series: phandom bingo 2018 [2]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M, Soulmates AU, Strangers to Lovers, soulbond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-20
Updated: 2018-10-20
Packaged: 2019-08-04 09:42:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16344407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelesterhowells/pseuds/thelesterhowells
Summary: A story where Dan is confronted with something he never believed was real.





	fog and glow

**Author's Note:**

  * For [stressedoutteenager](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stressedoutteenager/gifts).



> big thank you to [@spookyscaryskelephans](https://spookyscaryskelephans.tumblr.com/) for reading this over for me and to [@phanbliss](http://phanbliss.tumblr.com/) for the feedback and support! <3 
> 
> hope you enjoy :)

Dan was on his way to meet up with some friends. He wasn’t really motivated to leave his flat, but he hadn’t seen his friends in a long time and he actually missed talking to them. The only thing he hated more than leaving his flat to begin with was using public transportation in London. _Yes_ , _it is_ good for the environment _and_ he didn’t even own a car _and_ always using uber to get around wasn’t something he could actually afford.

But this didn’t mean that he wouldn’t complain every single time when he had to change the train at Piccadilly Circus. It was always so crowded and full of tourists and Dan could get overwhelmed pretty quickly.

He got off the train, stepped outside on the platform and was immediately greeted by a huge group of people waiting for a train. Everything was so fast paced, filled with all kinds of people trying to get home or catch their train to _somewhere_. There were voices all around him, so loud and blurred together into one sound that he couldn’t even make out one single word. Dan could feel his chest getting tight, and his breaths came out in short puffs. His breathing was too quick, as was his heartbeat; he was aware of that. He had to calm down now or he would be having a full-on panic attack in the middle of the Piccadilly Circus train station and that wasn’t something he would be able to handle today.

Dan realized he was simply staring at the people as if he’d never seen human beings before when a fancy looking businessman bumped into him trying to get past him.

“Can you stop standing around like some idiot, man?” He almost shouted at him, and Dan stumbled back a few steps, crashing right into a wall.

Meanwhile, a train started to move somewhere in the distance. A child screamed at his parents, demanding more chocolate. A woman brushed lightly against him while the wheels of her suitcase made such a loud noise that Dan felt like it must be rolling right through his brain.

He snapped out of his weird and slightly concerning trance and blinked before staring directly at the bluest eyes he had ever seen. The moment their eyes connected Dan felt like this person could literally see right into his soul and everything just _stopped._

He let his eyes wander around and everybody had stopped moving all of a sudden. He blinked a few times and – _were they walking in slow motion?_ He couldn’t hear any voices even though the people still moved their mouths. The train arriving at the station was going so slow that Dan was sure he was imagining it all together. His brain couldn’t process what was happening especially because – _was that guy glowing?_ He was actually and quite literally glowing. He looked like the sun just rose inside of him and burst out of his body.

His heartbeat slowed down to a normal pace. And an overwhelming feeling flooded through his body. It was a combination of so many emotions that it was hard to overthink everything. He felt completely at peace - with the world, himself, his life. He felt happiness sweep away any dark thoughts he just had. He surely must’ve fallen asleep on the train.

Dan was convinced that his brain was playing him some tricks, but his feelings were so realistic. He felt like he just exposed his most intimate self to that stranger. The scary part was that he didn’t freak out because of this vulnerability, not one bit.

And then the guy hurried out of the station and everything sped up. The second they broke eye contact, the voices were way too loud suddenly and Dan fought the urge to cover his ears with his hands. People started to shove him aside because he was _still_ standing in the middle of the platform, staring in the direction of the exit and wondering if he was actually so immensely sleep deprived that he imagined a glowing dude. 

-

He tried to not think about this incident for weeks, he just blamed it onto being overworked and tired and maybe watching too many science fiction movies. He promised himself to sleep more, watch less Netflix and to perhaps drink more water to keep his brain healthy and stop it from being weird.

He and his friends were supposed to go clubbing tonight, and Dan was actually motivated this time. He had mentally prepared himself and was convinced that he could handle all the strangers. It was the same crowd as weeks prior so Dan found himself thinking about that blue eyed man and hoping that he wasn’t just a product of his imagination. As he replayed the whole interaction in his brain for the thousandth time, he could only think about how beautiful that man was. He wished he could look into those eyes again, hear his voice just one time to see if it matched his vision.

“Yo, Dan. You going to pick up a hot somebody tonight?” Sean asked while they were riding the tube, pulling Dan out of his train of thought.

How can you explain to your friends that you hoped you would see a glowing, blue eyed dude again, who stopped all movements at a train station a few weeks ago, without them thinking that you definitely needed professional help? You can’t. So you pivot and just say the easy thing, the thing you always say.

“Don’t know. Maybe? I mean if somebody interests me, then, why not?”

“Ok, Dannyboy, let’s find you somebody interesting then. Come oooooooon,” Sean said as they were leaving the tube.

The club was loud as always. And crowded as always. And stuffy as always. Drunk people were dancing way too out of the rhythm, making out in corners and grinding on each other somewhat crudely. _Everything_ was as always.

Dan and his friends immediately went to the bar, got themselves something to drink and looked for a little booth to sit in. Dan was drinking his third whiskey sour when one of his best friends, Emma, came up to him.

“Daaaaaaan, you’re being way too boooooring. Come oooooon. Daaaaancing,” her words were slurred and hard to understand.

She just extended her hand to drag him to the dance floor while he downed the remnants  of his drink. Even if he whined, he was glad that somebody came to get him because once he settled down in a booth he often didn’t get up voluntarily.

He swayed a little as he got up, so he clutched Emma who was also not very steady on her legs which caused them to trip over their own feet multiple times and stumble to the dance floor, laughing hysterically. Dan was feeling particularly happy and free tonight. Drunkenly dancing with his best friends was undoubtedly balm for his soul. 

He was dancing very closely with Sean when it happened. He had his arms around Sean, smiling brightly when he felt somebody staring at him. His head turned around completely unintentional, and he immediately found the blue eyes that were looking directly at him.

It suddenly felt like his head was dunked underwater. Every sound was muffled, the music sounded dull. Sean was moving inhumanly slow in his arms, and as Dan scanned the club he realized that everybody in here was almost standing still. Every move was slowed down, every noise was muted, but every single one of Dan’s senses were heightened. He could somehow hear the guy’s breathing from across the room, smell his fruity shower gel, and Dan was dazzled by the light that was bursting out of him again.

Something was pulling him towards that person. Dan let go of Sean and started to approach the guy, making his way through the in slow motion dancing people. He was about to reach out when the guy bolted out of the club. Gone, like he never was there to begin with. Everything started to move again. He had hands everywhere on his body suddenly as the people around him danced at a normal speed again, but he didn’t move at all, just stared. He stared at the exit and tried to understand what just happened.

“Hey! Dan! Where’d you go so suddenly?” Sean was right in front of him.

“I – uhm. I don’t know,” Dan said and ran his hands through his hair quite aggressively, “I – didn’t you feel anything?” His voice sounded desperate, he could hear it very clearly.

Sean put his hand on Dan’s shoulder and looked him straight in the eyes.

“Feel what? Are you alright there, mate? Did you drink too much? Did you take something?”

“I don’t know, Sean. I – fuck. I think I’m - I’m going insane. I need to get out of here. I need to go home. I need sleep,” Dan’s voice was high pitched, almost panicked.

“Hey, it’s alright. Let me get you home, yeah? I’ll call us an uber. It’s fine, Dan. I’m here. You’re fine. Come on. Let’s go,” Sean tried to stay calm, but the confusion was very clearly written across his face.

He put his arm around Dan and guided him to the exit, while simultaneously texting their friends.

-

He swore that he wouldn’t think about it, but failed miserably. He was sitting on his couch and was trying to google _something_ , but like he imagined he couldn’t find anything. Several people in some dodgy forums where suggesting that you should seek help from a professional if you were imagining things or hearing things.

_Bullshit_ , he thought because Dan was sure that he wasn’t imagining this. He was sure that the blue eyed and black haired man really existed. But the thing he was the most sure about were his emotions. Because he couldn’t imagine feeling all of those feelings at once, could he? He couldn’t imagine the connection he felt with that man. He just couldn’t. He felt like he put his soul out in the open both times, hence why these encounters left him feeling absolutely vulnerable, but not afraid.

Dan was pretending that he doesn’t want to see that guy again, but if he was being honest to himself he knew that all he wanted to do was go out and look for him.

Truth be told, he would scan through every street in London if he was sure that he would find him. He wanted to know his name, wanted to know how his voice sounded and how his skin felt. He wanted to know how old he was and if he was close to his family. He wanted to know what he did for a living and if he went to uni. He wanted to ask him what he thought about Muse or Death Note. He wanted to know about each and every thought that ever crossed his brain. While Dan listed all of the things he wanted to know about that mysterious guy, he realized that it was _everything_. He wanted to know every single damn thing about him.

Dan knew that he couldn’t figure out who that guy was. He especially couldn’t know why he reacted so strangely when he saw him. The most frustrating thing was that he had no idea how to find the answers to his questions as he couldn’t exactly google it. His thoughts were spiraling and he needed to silence them, he needed air, he needed to calm down.

He got up from his couch, took his keys, phone and wallet and bolted out of his flat. The streets of London were surprisingly quiet in this area of town, especially at night.

It was quite warm for September so he stood still for a few moments. Looking up in the sky trying to see some constellations, letting the air rush into his lungs. The night sky always made him realize how insignificant and small he was. Hell, even the earth was small in comparison to other planets. It calmed him down, this thought that even if his problems seemed gigantic and unsolvable to him, compared to the entire universe it was nothing.

Breathing in counting to five, holding for four seconds and breathing out counting to seven. Slowly, but surely, the heaviness on his chest began to leave him. His thoughts stopped to orbit around the same situation over and over again.

He started to walk to his favourite coffee shop, where he constantly got his caffeine supply while he was still studying.

Like always, he ordered a caramel macchiato and sat down. Besides him, there was just one other customer who was reading a book in a small nook in the back of the shop. Dan didn’t listen to any music, didn’t look at his phone, he just sat there sipping his warm beverage and enjoying the nightly silence in the coffee shop.

For once he was not thinking about the mysterious guy though he was aware that he was quite obsessed. He was actually thinking about his work because some writing deadlines were due in a few days and stressed him out quite a bit when suddenly his head jerked up. There was nobody in sight and nobody came in, but he could _feel_ him. Not only that he was sure that he could _hear_ him, not his footsteps but more his thoughts. Dan knew that it was only a few seconds until the blue eyed man would walk right into this coffee shop, and he started to freak out. But _fuck_ he couldn’t wait to see him again.

While his thoughts started spiraling again, the door opened and there he was. Seeing him literally took Dan’s breath away, he audibly gasped and everything slowed down again. The barista who was cleaning a table just seconds ago was almost frozen in place. The reading customer needed inhumanly long to turn over a page. Dan saw and realized all of that, but his eyes were fixated on the guy.

He could hear him breathe again, he felt at peace and happy once again. The stress he felt a few moments ago were swept away and replaced with the exact opposite: a calmness he hadn’t felt since the last time their eyes connected.

This time would be different though. Dan got up, walked towards the guy with the sole intent to talk to him. Dan was a few little steps away from the guy when he turned around and started to walk towards the door. But Dan couldn’t let him go again, he just couldn’t and he wouldn’t.

“Hey! Stop. Wait a second, please!” Dan just wanted to talk to him so he reached out and this time he actually touched him before he could leave the place. The second Dan had his hand on the arm that was reaching out to open the door everything changed. 

Dan felt like an electric shock went through his whole body, their surroundings got blurry and everything became so surreal that Dan was sure he just fell asleep on his sofa. The coffee shop transformed right before his eyes and Dan was convinced that this couldn't be London anymore. They were standing in a field, a waterfall roaring right behind them, birds flying above their heads and the sun was dyeing everything a warm yellow colour.

He looked up and the guy looked right back and suddenly something burst out of Dan’s chest at the same time as something left the guy’s chest. It looked like outlines of human beings formed by incredibly thick fog and to be quite honest it just looked like a scene from a movie.

While the fog remained connected to each of their bodies, the outlines rushed towards each other and it swirled together right in the middle of them. Beautiful rainbow colours were surrounding the two outlines while they connected to create one giant foggy creature. Dan wasn’t able to make out where one of the outlines began and the other ended, they were hugging, it was obvious. The connection of the thing between them pulled Dan towards the guy and he just obeyed absolutely stunned and confused with this whole situation.

The outlines were pirouetting up in the sky, while the birds chirped and the rushing of the waterfall got louder, the colours intensified and the outlines started to glow and sparkle. With every step Dan took in the direction of the guy, the outlines swirled down a bit more.

When Dan stood in front of the blue eyed man, just a few steps away. The outlines were right above their heads in the middle of them. The birds grew silent for a second and the outlines untangled themselves from each other. Dan could clearly see two human forms again, both of them took the rainbow colours, the sparkle and glow with them.

While moving apart the outlines grabbed each others’ hands and stayed connected and at the same time rushing back into their respective bodies. They didn’t stay completely connected, Dan could _feel_ that this was not what this whole ordeal was about. They were not one of a whole, they were two humans that were matching somehow. After this Dan felt – _better._

“Fuck,” Dan said, “what the hell was that?”

“Oh, you don’t know?” The guy asked and Dan just wanted to smack him. _Obviously_ he had no idea.

“No, I don’t. Do you?”

“Uhm. Well, yes. I thought you knew, Dan. We – uhm. Our souls. They are connected. Quite literally as you could see,” he explained, but Dan was just as confused as before.

“They are what now? Wait. What – how do you know my name?”

“You know mine, too. Just – listen. Listen to what your soul tells you.”

Dan was absolutely sure that this was some kind of joke. Maybe his friends set him up? They liked bizarre jokes. They probably signed him up for some big scale TV prank, that must be it.

“Excuse me? Sorry, I should listen to what? _My soul?_ ” He couldn’t believe this, he honestly couldn’t believe this. Listening to his soul? What was that supposed to mean?

The guy just rolled his eyes and said, “Just concentrate. Close your eyes and listen.”

Dan didn’t want to do it. He really did not want to do what that strange dude said, but he had to try. Something inside of him pushed him to try. So he closed his eyes, concentrated and – he heard a whisper, it was very quiet, but very clear.

“Phil.”

“There you go. Yup, that’s me. Hi,” _Phil_ responded, grinning.

“Oh. Oh my god. What. I – what?”

“Yeah, it’s quite a concept, huh? I actually didn’t think that you had no idea? Maybe your parents are non-believers?”

Dan had no idea what Phil was talking about. All of this sounded like utter bullshit if he was being honest. Their souls were connected? His parents were what?

“Ok, wait. Wait a second. So you’re telling me that we’re basically – what – soulmates? How does that even work? Are we like each others ‘other halves’ or some shit?” He already knew the answer to this question, he had _felt_ the answer a few minutes ago, but he needed to hear it from Phil.

He just needed answers, really desperately. He didn’t believe in any of this, but he believed in every single thing he felt since he met Phil. There was _something_ , and he needed to know what it was.

Phil nodded in the direction of the tree – _the tree? When did that thing get here?_

They sat down, leaned against it and Phil sighed deeply before opening his mouth again.

“I don’t even know where this concept of two halves completing each other came from. That’s not it. You’re you and I’m me and we’re both totally complete, but our souls are simply drawn to each other. They want to be together, they just - match.”

Dan liked how that sounded, it sounded right. It felt like his soul was telling him to listen to what Phil was telling him.

“Oh. Ok, well, that sounds...not that bad. But you still sprinted away every time our paths crossed. Why?”

“I guess I was scared. I grew up with all the myths and all the stories surrounding the soulbonded. My parents are some, you know. They always told me how they met, and how difficult it was because it is seen as some kind of – I don’t know – obscenity? And the first time I saw you I – I knew that you were my soulmate. And god I just – it’s difficult for us out there. I tried to avoid it. You. But it’s not easy when your soul literally is drawn to somebody else’s,” he chuckles at the end, and the only thing Dan could think about is how cute it sounded.

“But I’ve never heard of this? I mean – if other people feel that, too then – I don’t know but people have to talk about this or something?” Dan was confused, absolutely and utterly confused.

His whole world, everything he knew was wonky right now. So very wonky that he’s sure everything is going to crash down onto him. He never believed in soulmates. Not even for one second. And here he was sitting beside a person who very clearly was connected to his soul – a literal soulmate.

“Well, the soulbonded were targeted for a long time. _They_ erased all evidence that we existed, they hunted so many people. It’s quite the secret, but in more cases than not the soulbonded know who they are. But not always, obviously.”

“That sounds horrible. I can’t believe I didn’t know about this. I don’t know what to do with this. I just – I’m overwhelmed.”

Phil looked at him with an expression Dan couldn’t figure out before it was replaced by amusement and a laugh.

“I can only imagine. We don’t have to talk about all of this now. We can just drink a coffee, and I’ll answer all your questions. I don’t know, mate, but you’re kinda stuck with me now. Let’s get back.”

Dan smiled at him. Having coffee, sitting right next to Phil and asking a lot of questions sounded great. And to be honest he never wanted Phil to leave his side again. He was feeling quite content when a thought violently tickled his brain.

“And how the fuck are we supposed to go back, mate? Where even are we?”

Phil full on laughed at him, put his arm around Dan’s waist and said, “We’ll figure it out. Trust me.”

And Dan did.  

-

The autumn sun coming in through the windows warmed up the whole room. Dan woke up feeling way too hot with Phil’s body slung around his back like a human jetpack. Dan slowly wiggled himself out of the grip and turned to his side. He squished one hand under his cheek and absorbed every little detail of a peacefully sleeping Phil. He tried to count the freckles, gave up on that pretty quickly, and just ran his fingers over Phil’s arm as light as a feather trying not to wake him up.

And while gazing at Phil and smiling like an idiot Dan asked himself - _do soulmates actually exist?_

 

**Author's Note:**

> [come and say hi and maybe reblog on tumblr](https://thelesterhowells.tumblr.com/post/179251047017/fog-and-glow) :)


End file.
